the evolution of women

It’s 2012.  We’ve burned bras, been given the right to vote, hold Chief Officer positions.  So why is it as women we have yet to evolve?  Allow me to elaborate…

A recent break-up had me kvetching to a friend.  She was supportive, completely on my side (even after I admitted that to some extent I was at fault), and offered me the simple advice to get right back on the saddle and find a normal single guy my own age.  I replied “There’s a reason guys my own age are still single” to which she said “You would know!” followed by "I am so glad to be out of the dating game!"  A dig?  A slight?  I’m not sure.  Another friend refers to social outings with her “parent friends” and, being a childfree woman by choice, I sometimes don’t qualify for an invite which I do understand, I just don’t get the need to label.  These women are my friends, my confidants, my champions, yet they make me feel small for not choosing their same path in life.  I know this isn’t their intent…but it happens often enough to make me ask…why haven’t we evolved?

Can we discuss too, baby and wedding showers?  Women sitting around a bride-to-be or expectant mother to ooooh and aaaah as each gift is opened and passed around.  Commenting, critiquing, criticising.  We play games, drink punch, eat finger sandwiches and brag about our kids and husbands. (Well, everyone else does…I sit in a corner getting drunk with the expectant dad or father-of-the-bride because I haven’t got either said kids or husband to speak of so the booze and men at these events are my only friends). The gifting has evolved exponentially since my mother’s days of tea cups and nursing blankets…so why haven’t the events themselves?

Do forgive me for saying so, but I'm not all that keen on male strippers (sorry, Magic Mike).  Have been once, ‘twas a horrible experience, not keen to return any time soon.  Went for a friend’s bachelorette, she was on stage hooting and hollering and bumping and grinding while I happily sat in the shadows, mortified; I found her behaviour appalling…she found mine homosexual and chose to call me out on it.  Sorry dear, it doesn’t take a greased up juice-head wagging his dick in my face to prove I’m straight. Why haven’t we evolved beyond Chippendales as a panty-creamer?  And speaking of wet panties, why is it Fifty Shades is so popular when erotic literature has been around for years?  Fanny Hill, Lady Chatterley’s Lover, The Story of O…erotica has never been considered acceptable book club material until Fifty Shades of Mommy Porn was born.  Own it ladies, don’t be ashamed if you’ve read one (or all three) of the aforementioned books…they’ll make Mr Grey look like Mr Rogers.  I promise.

To wrap things up, I do confess…I am guilty of the girlie tear down.  You cheat on your partner? I judge. You use your kids to punish your ex?  I judge. You wear pyjama pants as daywear? Oh honey, I will judge and judge some more!

But ladies, we aren’t in grade 10 anymore...we aren't fighting over boys, positions on the cheerleading squad or competing for a role in the school play…we aren't fighting to be the same as one another to be accepted.  Let’s celebrate having the kinds of choices not afforded our mothers and grandmothers before us, celebrate being women with strong minds and strong voices, celebrate breaking free from the pumpkin shell! 

As usual, I welcome your opinions (and I expect more than a few of you will have something to say) but please, enough with the tear downs and disrespect, and let's just agree to disagree!